Approaching the difficult decision to divorce

Most people take marriage very seriously. This is why they may date several people until they find the right one. They may even delay proposing or accepting a proposal because the weight of the decision carries so many consequences. A marriage begins with vows and is often witnessed by dozens of family members and friends. These and other factors make it very difficult for a spouse to decide when to end a marriage.

It is a rare marriage that does not have its challenges, and some of these can be quite serious. Some Texas couples manage to blaze through the hard times and come out better for them. Others see their relationships torn by the slightest bump in the road. No matter where you are on the spectrum, the decision to leave your marriage is deeply personal and should not be made lightly.

How long should you wait?

Unhappiness is a strong indicator that something is wrong in the marriage. Whether this is related to your own dissatisfaction or the actions of your spouse, it may be something you have carried around for months or even years. In fact, if you’ve been married for a significant amount of time, you may feel you have invested too much time in the marriage to break it up. Unfortunately, carrying around that unhappiness can have negative effects on many areas of life, including your health, your job and other relationships.

You may already know that you have a difficult decision to make, but it may help to consider some of the following questions:

• Does the thought of your marriage leave you feeling empty?
• Have you lost the desire to be intimate with your spouse, or is your spouse no longer intimate with you, physically or emotionally?
• Have you forgotten the last time you laughed with your spouse or enjoyed each other’s company?
• Are you feeling hopeless that your relationship with your spouse will ever be better?
• Do you feel indifferent about your spouse or even imagine life without him or her?

Of course, if you are living with abuse, addiction or infidelity, you may have even stronger reasons for considering divorce. Some counselors recommend taking time away from the stress to seriously weigh your options. Divorce is seldom easy, and it will be important to know what to expect throughout the process and beyond. It is wise to obtain solid advice and guidance as early as possible in your decision-making to improve the chances of making a well-informed choice.